now i know (there's no hope)

you don't even know the pain i feel
when i start to question what is real
i know you're the cause
my lust for you gnaws
its way, through my brain
and i'm here, alone standing
by myself, with tears of understanding
rolling down my cheeks

now i know my bended
heart won't be mended
by your love....
no longer will i cry
or ask for help from up above
i don't blame thee
i blame myself for my insecurities

this time i'm really confused
about what i should do
i have this fear of never being satisfied
i can't find stable happiness,
i've tried and tried
this isn't easy,
i'm the butt of my own joke
i want some affection, this is all i hope

now i know my bended
heart won't be mended
by your love....
no longer will i cry
or ask for help from up above
and i'll live my life until i die
wondering if i'll ever be satisfied
it's not easy being the butt of your own joke
i want some affection, this is all i hope